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Football transfer rumours: Liverpool to sign Klaas-Jan Huntelaar?Today's food for thought is best before 6am
(1)Tweet this (36)Paul Doyle guardian.co.uk, Friday 23 July 2010 08.38 BST Article history
Gérard Houllier with one good signing and two other players. Photograph: Phil Noble/PA
Many foolish Liverpool fans were disappointed by the appointment of Roy Hodgson to the helm of their club but the new manager has begun winning them over thanks to the signing of Joe Cole, sensible utterances in press conferences and, of course, the abiding mastery of Gérard Houllier.
As anyone who read Houllier's interview in the Evening Standard this week knows, Houllier inspired Liverpool to victory in the 2005 Champions League and may well be responsible for everything good that has ever happened to the club and, indeed, the city.
For, in reality, was it not the boundless mastery of Houllier that convinced Cole and, come to think of it, Kenny Dalglish and Bill Shankly to go to Anfield? And who do you think it was who persuaded Fernando Torres to get rid of that Bruno-esque barnet? And do you really think that it is mere coincidence that the most successful band of all time came from the city that was fleetingly home to Houllier, the Secret Driver Of All Men and Deeds?
So when Hodgson announces some time soon that he has resolved Liverpool's left-back problems by recruiting either Paul Konchesky, Marseille's Taye Taiwo, Wayne Bridge or Maynor Figueroa, remember who's really responsible.
Similarly, if another word on the grapevine turns out to be true – such as that Hodgson is closing in on the capture of Milan's Dutch striker Klaas-Jan Huntelaar, remember who conceived, cultivated and propagated that grapevine, that callous, ungrateful cad of a grapevine.
There is, of course, life beyond Liverpool, even if Houllier has never quite accepted that. In Manchester, for instance, Nemanja Vidic is about to sign a bumper contract that will keep him at Old Trafford and Real Madrid at bay. The Serbian will soon have a new team-mate too, as Sir Alex Ferguson and Standard Liège midfielder Steven Defour are finally going to consummate their long-distance love affair.
Stoke are going to give West Ham 10m reasons why they should let Carlton Cole go, while Aston Villa want to offer a route back into England to former Arsenal midfielder and current Milan employee Mathieu Flamini.
Harry Redknapp is off to Lille to try to nab striker Gervinho before Spartak Moscow get there.
William Gallas is, apparently, "poised to sign for PSG", suggesting he is currently hovering over Paris with a pen in his hand, just waiting, perhaps, for Houllier to discreetly lower him towards the dotted line.
Because Jospeh Yobo's brother was this week held up and robbed at a cash point in Liverpool (what do you have to say for yourself, Gérard?), Owen Coyle hopes the centre-back might fancy a move to Bolton.
"Both Edin Dzeko and Zvjezdan Misimovic be VfL Wolfsburg remain, no matter what offers come yet," manager Dieter Hoeness said.